Me. Right now.

Oh here I am.
Just myself still. A little but bipolar.
But I'll get over it.

This week is crazy busy. I have something going on every single night. It's insane. But I'm going to the Evolution of Dance concert with Janae.. It is the most amazing concert ever. So I'm very excited about that. What else, what else?? It's almost February. I cannot believe that. I turn 19 this year, wow. I know that's not way old, but to me, it feels old!

I cannot believe that President Hinckley has died. I'm very happy for him, and for him being reunited with his wife. That is so exciting. But he's been the prophet for my whole life, well, he's the only one that I can remember. So it's definitely going to be a big change.

Well that's all I think. Me and Caleb have been together 9 months as of tomorrow! :)
So exciting. I love him :)

"Catch Me When I Fall"

"Is anybody out there
Does anybody see
That when the lights are off something's killing me
I know it seems like people care
Cause they're always around me
But when the day is done and everybody runs

Who will be the one to save me from myself
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl
Who's gonna catch me when I fall

When the show is over
And it's empty everywhere
It's hard to face going back alone
So I walk around the city
Anything, anything to clear my head
I've got nowhere to go nowhere but home

Who will be the one to save me from myself
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl
Who's gonna catch me when I fall

It may seem I have everything
But everything means nothing
When the ride that you've been on
That you're coming off
Leaves you feeling lost

Is anybody out there
Does anyobdy see
That sometimes loneliness is just a part of me

Who will be the one to save me from myself?
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl?
Who's gonna catch me when I fall?
Who's gonna catch me when I fall?
Who's gonna catch me when I fall
And not ashamed to see me crawl?
Who's gonna catch me when I fall?"

I love this song by Ashlee Simpson.
She can totally put my emotions into words.
Almost all of her songs can explain me.
And this one most of all.

The New Year

well. its the new year. i cannot believe how fast last year went by. especially this last semester. and now my second semester of college has officially begun. wow. my classes are going to be interesting, maybe a bit hard, but full of good stuff to know. im taking bom, geology, humanities, french, history of dance, and modern dance. oh man. im so sore from dance, and i love it! i havent danced since last may, and its wonderful to be doing it again!
hm. what else?? caleb leaves this year. oh my. its getting closer and closer with every day. its so exciting, and so scary, and so...... well, it just is. he can put his papers in super soon. im not sure how i will handle this. he told me i get too attached to people. and its so true. which is why im terrified of him leaving.
but. the devotional this week was by president and sister samuelson. i loved sister samuelsons talk. it was about we shouldnt wish away some days just to get to the weekend. or anything like that. and i was like, thats so true. i shouldnt just mope around waiting for caleb to come home. i mean, dont get me wrong, i do have fun. but maybe i focus too much on that. and that's not too good. so i need to focus on other things as well. i have like my next two years planned out. there really is so much stuff that i want to do while caleb is gone/while im single. some of the things are being an efy counselor, study abroad to france, living in the french house, trying out and making dancers company at byu..... and a few more as well.
so thats the plan. but. i still miss him like crazy. but its ok. really.
well. thats all............ he's wonderful :)